


we were wild and fluorescent (come home to my heart)

by cheschi



Category: Anne with an E (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Gen, Love Letters, Modern AU, Modern Era, Slow Burn, but the real slow burn is how long it took me to actually finish this, the college au literally nO ONE asked for but which i wrote anyway
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-04
Updated: 2021-01-04
Packaged: 2021-03-09 18:22:36
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27890710
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cheschi/pseuds/cheschi
Summary: To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)Dear Gilbert,If you're wondering why I'm emailing you, it has to do with the ring you left at the party at Charlie’s place last weekend before you left. I emptied my coat yesterday and it rolled out along with Diana’s mascara. Imagine my surprise when I found it there until Charlie told me that it was yours.I never pegged you for the ring type but it's here nonetheless. Hopefully you weren't worrying about its whereabouts for too long. Maybe it'll serve as a reminder of home in some strange way, knowing that there's gold waiting for you in Avonlea.Sincerely,Anne Shirley Cuthbert(or, Gilbert goes on exchange and he and Anne rediscover the value of email)
Relationships: Gilbert Blythe & Anne Shirley, Gilbert Blythe/Anne Shirley
Comments: 20
Kudos: 109





	we were wild and fluorescent (come home to my heart)

**Author's Note:**

> title from the ultra banger supercut by lorde because would i be a real college kid if i didn’t use the lyrics as a title at least once in my life?
> 
> i'm not even kidding when i say this has been sitting half-finished in my drafts for at least 2 years (i literally wrote this between s2 and s3's release LMFAO) but life and school have been super hard lately and ruining me lately so might as well finish this
> 
> thank u to one direction for their discography without which i may not have finished this fic
> 
> p.s. they attend community college in this and are in their second year and are all going in different directions after  
> p.p.s. unbeta'd; u have been warned

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

 _Dear Gilbert,_ _  
  
_

_If you're wondering why I'm emailing you, it has to do with the ring you left at the party at Charlie’s place last weekend before you left. I emptied my coat yesterday and it rolled out along with Diana’s mascara. Imagine my surprise when I found it there until Charlie told me that it was yours._

_I never pegged you for the ring type but it's here nonetheless. Hopefully you weren't worrying about its whereabouts for too long. Maybe it'll serve as a reminder of home in some strange way, knowing that there's gold waiting for you in Avonlea._

_I would've texted you for practicality’s sake but you said that the signal would be spotty and unpredictable over there for the first few weeks. I hope you get to check this whenever you get internet then._

_Sincerely,_ _  
_ _Anne Shirley Cuthbert_

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_The most surprising thing about your message wasn’t even that you were using email instead of messaging me but that you didn’t seize the opportunity to go all out and write a letter complete with a wax seal and all. Anne Shirley Cuthbert using a computer instead of the post system to communicate? Truly a modern tragedy._

_Just kidding. All jokes aside, thanks for your email. I didn't realize the ring was missing because I meant to leave it behind in Avonlea for safekeeping. I figured it would be safer there than if I brought it out here with me, moving from place to place and all that, especially since it was my dad’s. I thought I left it at home but from the looks of it I guess I drank more that night than I thought I did._

_The homesickness hasn’t kicked in yet but the thought of it safe in Green Gables is going to help me sleep easier for sure. I hate to ask this but if it isn’t too much trouble, would you mind keeping the ring for me until I get back in the summer? It’s with you already (sorry again) and I can't think of a person who would take care of something old and vintage like that any better than you._

_Hope you’re all doing well back in Avonlea. Give my best to Matthew and Marilla._

_Regards,_

_Gilbert Blythe_

_  
_ _P.S. I would be lying if I said I wasn't surprised to see you sign the email off using ‘sincerely.’ I would've thought the adverb was too humdrum for you, lacking pizazz and all that._

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_Dear Gilbert,_

_Trust me, if you weren’t moving around every couple days and actually had an address I could send mail to and if postage wasn’t as exorbitantly expensive as it is, I would have. There are far too few opportunities nowadays to send mail to places outside PEI; when else am I going to get to? Maybe I’ll send one when you finally settle down and start your semester._

_Your father had lovely taste in rings. It wouldn’t be a hassle at all to keep it for you until you get back. Speaking of which, how is exploring Europe before classes treating you?_

_Yours truly,_

_Anne_

_P.S. Haha, very funny. I was sincere when writing it but now I’m not so sure. :P_

_P.P.S. Funnily enough, Marilla recognized the ring as soon as she saw it on my dresser when she came into my room last night. Wonder how she knew it was yours so fast._

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_P.P.S. Funnily enough, Marilla recognized the ring as soon as she saw it on my dresser when she came into my room last night. Her exact words were, “Did Gilbert leave this ring with you?” I told her you left it at Charlie’s and asked her why she was asking._

_She shrugged while bringing out the laundry and said that you might want me to have it to remember you by. I have_ no _idea where she would’ve gotten such a preposterous idea._ _It’s not like you’re_ dying _or anything._ _She’s been spending way too much time with Mrs. Lynde._

[Draft saved]

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_I’d hate to be the thing that stands in the way of you getting to send your mail. I'll send you my address as soon as I have one. I'm looking forward to that letter. I'll write back and send it complete with a trained carrier pigeon with its own satchel._

_Europe has been great so far. There’s so much to do every day and so many hidden places to explore. There are so many museums Cole would love and I bet between the two of you we’d all spend hours wandering the same gallery. Diana and Ruby would adore all the small cafes here overlooking rivers and parks. I found one with the_ best _mango tarts the other day. Let me know if you guys want anything. Maybe all of us can take a trip here someday after graduation._

_How’s everything back at home?_

_Regards,_

_Gilbert_

_P.S. He and Marilla were friends when they were younger, I think. He mentioned it once when you first came to Avonlea but I never really asked about it after and he never said anything more about it._

  
  


To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_I can’t think of anything that’s changed drastically in the 2 weeks that you’ve been away. We went to see Mamma Mia 2 last weekend and Moody fell asleep. I don’t understand how anyone can get bored listening to ABBA, even if Colin Firth can’t dance._

_Diana, Ruby, and I all officially want to drop out of college now and start a hotel on a small Greek island while singing all day. Have you ever heard of anything more exciting?_

_Do visit Greece for us if you get the chance to._

_Cole had another exhibit the other day and it was a little strange not having you there to take all his photos._

_Yours truly,_

_Anne_

  
  


To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)  
From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_That sounds like quite the adventure. You three would definitely be well-suited to run a hotel in Greece and live the rest of your days there. Sounds fun, will try to catch it the next time I’m on a plane._

_How was Cole’s exhibit?? He sent me some photos and this is some of his best work yet. Sad that I couldn’t be there in person but I trust that you all had fun. Take care of yourselves back there. :)_

_Regards,_

_Gilbert_

* * *

**_12-08 boys_ **

February 12 2:00 AM

from: Charlie

 _gIL_

February 12 2:00 AM

from: Charlie

 _bro_

February 12 2:00 AM

from: Charlie

_I kinda misss yo_

February 12 2:02 AM

from: Cole

_Ok who’s with drunk charlie_

February 12 2:05 AM

from: Jerry

_Not me_

February 12 2:05 AM

from: Jerry

_Dibs not carrying him back_

February 12 2:06 AM

from: Moody

_Not me either_

February 12 2:06 AM

from: Moody

_Ditto not bringing him home_

February 12 2:06 AM

from: Cole

_i hate u all sigh_

February 12 2:07 AM

from: Cole

_ok charles where r u_

February 12 2:07 AM

from: Gilbert

_Sorry I can’t be there to help u Cole_

February 12 2:07 AM

from: Gilbert

_And I miss u too Charlie_

February 12 3:00 AM

from: Cole

_Gilbert pls come back Charlie is crying on my shoulder about how the apartment isn’t the same anymore_

February 12 3:05 AM

from: Gilbert

_ <3 _

* * *

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_I've made friends with one of the local students here. His name is Sebastian but everyone mostly just calls him Bash._

_You would like Bash. He's smart, witty, and perhaps most important of all, he doesn't let me get away with anything. He’s majoring in Economics and Political Science, really similar to what I wanted to do in high school before I decided on pre-med. He’s a mature student finishing his degree now because he had to take some years off to help support his family and found himself a father at 22. His daughter Delphine is one of the cutest kids I’ve ever seen and she’s a complete and utter sweetheart._

_Bash promised to show me around Trinidad when our Anthropology Research class goes there this semester for our site visit. Why can't we have nice things like this in ACC?_

_Regards,_

_Gilbert_

_  
  
  
_

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_Anyone who doesn’t let you get away with anything earns my respect instantly. I like him already._

_Speaking of new people, there’s a new assistant professor here at ACC that arrived here last week. We accidentally walked into one of Dr. Stacy’s lectures when we were looking for the French club but I’m so glad we did because she’s absolutely_ amazing _. She’s going to be in the Astronomy department and she used to work at NASA before leaving to get her PhD in London. I heard she’s planning to take over Dr. Peter’s Astronomy 101 class. Honestly, why couldn’t she have come earlier when we all took that class in freshman year? Maybe then we wouldn’t have all fallen asleep during almost every lecture._

_Thoughtfully,_

_Anne_

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_The moment I knew Dr. Peter’s was a truly awful professor was when I saw you dozing off during the lectures. I've got another class in 5 but are you all free for a Zoom call tonight? Excited to hear what everyone's been up to._

_Regards,_

_Gilbert_

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_Dear Gilbert,_

_What's that supposed to mean? He truly was a terrible professor but that's besides the point. Does 6PM your time work for you? We're all getting brunch in the morning._

_Thoughtfully,_

_Anne_

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

Dear Anne,

 _Anyone who can make_ you _of all people fall asleep over a discussion of the alignment of the planets and the origin of galactic names is probably not that great a teacher. This is coming from the same girl who read the dictionary for fun in the 8th grade to widen her vocabulary._

Your friend,

Gilbert

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_I can't believe you still remember that. (You don't get much to say about that though Gilbert. Let't not forget who was next to me about to do the same thing. :P)_

_Thoughtfully,_

_Anne_

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_It's a bit hard to forget when your dictionary days only shortly preceded the Great Slate Incident of the eighth grade. Maybe I remember it so clearly because my memory of everything else after was a bit hazy. I'm told being whacked by a slate has the tendency to do that to someone._

_Time really flies, doesn't it?_

_Your friend,_

_Gilb_

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_It really does._

_Thoughtfully,_

_Anne_

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_It's so strange to think that we were all strangers 8 years ago and how far fate has brought us, all the way to ACC. I can hardly believe it myself. More than how far we've all come--you, me, Diana, Charlie, Jerry, Ruby and all--it's even crazier to think where we're going to be after next year. Diana is heading off to England after graduation, Jerry is going back to help his family, I'm going wherever the wind will take me and my crazy doctor dreams, and you're probably off to succeed wherever you end up, whether it's at Queens or anywhere else._

_Suddenly I feel like I'm in high school again and as exciting as the future seems, I'm not sure if I'm ready for any of what's to come. I don't know if I'm ready to say goodbye either._

_Your friend,_

_Gilbert_

[Draft saved]

* * *

March 23 4:04 PM

from: Diana

_Hey are we still on for movie night at Moody’s room later?_

March 23 4:04 PM

from: Diana

_I’m bringing strawberry ice cream_

March 23 4:04 PM

from: Diana

_FYI you left your email open when you used my laptop. I didn’t read anything I promise but I noticed there was an email thread with Gilbert_

March 23 4:06 PM

from: Anne

_Oh._

March 23 4:08 PM

from: Diana

_With 68 messages???_

March 23 4:10 PM

from: Anne

_Thank you for not reading my emails. I know you wouldn’t._

March 23 4:11 PM

from: Diana

_Wouldn’t it be easier to text each other or video call?_

March 23 4:15 PM

from: Anne

_It probably would._

March 23 4:15 PM

from: Anne

_But he’ll be home in a few months. Why would I want to video call him_

March 23 4:16 PM

from: Diana

_Idk maybe for the same reason you have a thread 68 messages long_

March 23 4:06 PM

from: Anne

_I have no idea what you’re getting at_

March 23 4:04 PM

from: Diana

 _All I’m saying is that you wouldn’t be emailing him if you didn’t_ want _to_

March 23 4:06 PM

from: Anne

_It would be rude to suddenly stop replying at this point_

March 23 4:06 PM

from: Anne

_And besides, he’s the one who’s continuing it, not me_

March 23 4:04 PM

from: Diana

_...Didn’t you email him first????_

* * *

March 23 5:34 PM

from: Diana

_Am I the only one who didn’t know about Gilbert and Anne’s emails?_

* * *

March 23 5:34 PM

from: Cole

_yes_

March 23 5:35 PM

from: Cole

_i found out from charlie after he called gilbert to make sure he wasn’t looking for his ring_

March 23 5:45 PM

from: Diana

_They’ve been at it since January_

March 23 5:45 PM

from: Cole

_i know, it’s nauseating_

March 23 6:00 PM

from: Diana

_I actually find it kind of cute_

March 23 6:17 PM

from: Cole

_well now that you know you’re welcome to join the betting pool_

* * *

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_Bash and I went out last night. Trinidad booze is so different from whatever we have back home. I took a drink of whatever Bash was having and ended up puking on the street._ _My head was throbbing like crazy the next day and the last time I was out like that was the weekend before I left. Which got me thinking about the party Charlie threw for me..._

_I don't know how much of that night you remember because you and Diana and Charlie all passed out after your 6th or so shot but before that you told me to take care of myself out here._

_There’s no need to worry that I won’t because I will...but is it bad that the thought of your concern makes it a little easier to do so?_

[Draft saved]

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_Diana, Ruby, Cole, I were all able to get a slot in Professor Stacy’s class, believe it or not. Even Moody and Charlie got it. She’s teaching an astrology elective which isn’t at all related to any of our majors, except maybe Diana’s, but her class is fascinating. We’ve only had two meetings but she’s managed to cover all the great thinkers of the past and talk about how philosophy has shaped the study._

_Isn’t that amazing?_ _I may have had a life-changing revelation the other day. What if it's not actually writing that I want to pursue but maybe teaching?_ _I never really thought about it but now I can’t stop. I’m seriously thinking about changing my proposed major to education if I really want to pursue a career in academia after university…It’s either that or maybe even philosophy._

_I thought I knew what I wanted to do but I think I’m more confused than ever now. Not entirely in a bad way, though; it just feels like there are a million possibilities. It must be nice to be sure of exactly what you want to do, especially when it’s as noble as medicine. Ruby must be pleased to know that all her years of forcing us to binge Grey’s Anatomy with her has paid off for one of us at least. Hah!_

_All the best,_

_Anne_

_P.S. Diana and I watched the Dead Poet's Society again last weekend and we've shifted our sights from starting a hotel in Greece to starting ACC's first spoken word poetry club. God knows this place could use it._

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_Apologies for the late reply. Biochemistry is honestly, truly, wholly kicking my ass and there's nothing I can seem to do about it no matter how much I try. I thought last semester would've prepared me better for it but I find myself stumped after every class and spending hours outside class trying to catch, only for the next week to roll around and needing to frantically to do all the pre-reads again like the vicious cycle it is._

_I've known since high school indeed and even if Grey's had nothing to do with it, I'll admit that it made the thought of it all a little more exciting. Still, I don't think all the mental prep in the world could've readied me for this. And to think it's only the beginning of this entire journey. Hah!_

_It's nice to know what you want to do but it's equally great to not know what you want to do. The world is your map and you're free to go anywhere you want and change your course as you see fit along the way. Wherever you go, Anne, I know you're going there with reason._

_Your friend,_

_Gilbert_

_P.S. Spoken word club sounds great. You guys should ask Mrs. Lynde if you can perform at Lynde's Coffee during the weekends._

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_I never thought I’d say it but it’s a little strange not having you around here in the Avonlea._

_It’s the little things, like Diana saying that there’s no one to study with for her pre-med stuff, or the fact that it’s a little more quiet in the library when I read. It’s nice, but at the same time there’s no one to argue with over Star Wars or the classics._

_I’ve start peer reviewing essays under Professor Andrews in the English department. He mentioned that it’s a shame you’re not here because we could use someone with your sharp eye. I don’t know how true that is but I will admit solving the crossword isn’t that same without anyone to compare answers with._

_I’m pretty sure I spotted a typo the other day. Smell of the rain, 9 letters. Easily should’ve been petrichor but they only had 8 boxes. Can you imagine that? A_ **_TYPO_ ** _in the crossword. What have we come to as a society._

_I found myself looking around the library to point it out to but no one had the reaction I was quite hoping for. Diana laughed politely but it would’ve been nice to have had someone else to laugh at it with. You know, strictly one crossword aficionado to another._

_Do you know the etymology of aficionado? Spanish for amateur, but also for being fond of something._

_Anyway._

[Draft saved] _  
_

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Bash saw my wallpaper from that night all of us went to Cole’s art exhibit, you know, the one decent picture Charlie’s ever taken with the snow falling on all of us. He asked me which one my girlfriend was and part of me wanted to say you._

_Anyway._

[Draft saved]

April 4 2:00 AM

from: Anne

How did you know you liked Jerry?

April 4 2:02 AM

from: Diana

_??_

April 4 2:02 AM

from: Diana

_I guess it was the little things_

April 4 2:02 AM

from: Diana

_Looking forward to hanging out with him, smiling at his texts, replying faster than my fingers would let me_

April 4 2:04 AM

from: Anne

_Oh no_

[Draft saved]

April 4 2:10 AM

from: Diana

_Why the sudden question???_

April 4 2:15 AM

from: Anne

_Bc I've been looking at all my unsent drafts to Gilbert Blythe and there is something very wrong with my stomach right now_

[Draft saved]

April 4 2:15 AM

from: Anne

_Nothing, just needed some input for my Psych paper_

April 4 2:15 AM

from: Anne

_Are we still on for brunch tomorrow?_

April 4 2:17 AM

from: Diana

_Always :) I have my copy of Little Women ready for noontime reading_

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_Dear Gilbert,_

_I know your last email mentioned that you're heading to Trinidad soon but Diana is asleep now and I can't stop thinking about my midterm tomorrow. I decided to start drafting the preliminary proposal to the Student Activities Association to calm my nerves instead._

_Diana, Ruby, and I are serious about this spoken word club. The only thing we need left is an adviser for administrative stuff to comply with school policy. Our options were either Professor Philipps, just because he signs off on all the media club's official forms, or Professor Andrews, who looks like he looks like he would rather take a nap elsewhere when someone speaks during our Post-Modern Literature classes. Neither of them are great options (no offense to Jane and Prissy), so I guess we need to start elsewhere. I wonder if the school would let us get someone from another department._

_In other news, a magazine internship that I applied for way back in November last year just got back to me offering me a full-time position this summer in Toronto. It starts right 3 days right after our semester ends and a week before you fly back to Avonlea. The position runs the whole summer and they said that if I do well, it could extend to a longer internship for the rest of the year. Can you believe it--Toronto? I could be there for almost a whole year by myself. My feet are tingling just thinking about it._

_I_ _haven't told Matthew and Marilla about it yet but my heart feels so full it could burst right now._

_Thoughtfully,_

_Anne_

_P.S. When are you leaving for your trip again?_

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_Toronto? That's amazing, Anne. I can't imagine anyone more deserving of this._

_It's wrong of me to think this now of all times, but if you're gone from next month indefinitely and I head off to med school...what then?_

[Draft saved]

To: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

From: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com)

_Dear Anne,_

_That's amazing! I'm sorry I can't be there to congratulate you in person and that this email is so short, but I'm boarding in a few minutes and this_ _might be the last email from me in a while._

_We're headed to Trinidad now for the next 2 weeks and the cell service and wifi reception aren't going to be particularly great so if anything interesting and worth hearing about happens, expect to hear about it by mail. Probably half a month after said interesting event happened._

_Your friend,_ _  
_

_Gilbert_

* * *

_April 25, 2018_

_Anne Shirley Cuthbert  
_ _#11-02 Montgomery Hall  
_ _Avonlea Community College  
_ _Prince Edward Island_

_Dear Anne,_

_I hope this letter finds you well. As the brochures and website all promised, the countryside here is as beautiful and interesting as it is devoid of reliable cell service. At least for where we're staying anyway. Sorry that I wasn't able to fulfill my end of the bargain and send this through a carrier pigeon, but it’s the thought that counts, right?_

_Our flight to Trinidad arrived here three days ago but this is the only free time I’ve all all week to sit down and write this letter. The workload for this class is a little insane and I’m reading almost 50 pages a day, on top of all the pre-reads I had to do before we got here._

_You would like Trinidad. I wouldn't go so far as to say you'd love it here but I know you would be deeply fascinated by the place. Skies that seem bluer than they did back home, waters so clear that you can almost see what's at the bottom of the sea floor, and enough flavors to put even Rachel Lynde's cooking to shame._ _  
_ _  
_ _I took so many pictures my phone is almost running out of memory so I bought one of those small disposable cameras last week from a tourist gift shop. Here's a picture of a seashell I found last week by the shore._

_Your friend,_

_Gilbert_

* * *

May 4 3:40 PM

From: Diana

_Anne, there's mail for you out on the table_

May 4 3:44 PM

From: Anne

 _Is it the library_ _again? I thought I paid my overdue fines last month already_

May 4 3:50 PM

From: Diana

_It was sent from Trinidad_

May 4 3:50 PM

From: Diana

_Just like Gilbert's letter that came yesterday_

May 4 3:52 PM

From: Anne

_Another letter...????_

May 4 3:56 PM

From: Diana

_Idk Anne you tell me_

* * *

April 27, 2019

 _Anne Shirley Cuthbert  
_ _#11-02 Montgomery Hall  
_ _Avonlea Community College  
_ _Prince Edward Island_

_Dear Anne,_

_Pardon my illegible scrawl but this was the only good stationery I had with me and Bash lent me his pen for this. In all honesty, my hands are shaking a bit as I write this but I didn't know when else to send it._

_I’ve been thinking about it nonstop and it’s 2 AM here and there are no lights in the tent we’re staying in so I’m writing this by candlelight and hoping our RA doesn’t come by. I’ve been thinking about our conversations these past few days and I can’t stop thinking about any of them. They play over my head again and again like that time Liability was stuck in my head for 2 weeks on end because you were obsessed with Lorde and blasted it from the 11th floor on full blast._

_It's you, Anne Shirley Cuthbert. I think I've known for a long time, probably since the day you whacked me with a slate in 8th grade. You and you alone are the keeper of the key to my heart, if you'll have it._

_I understand that you may not feel the same way. It wasn’t and never will be my intention to pressure you into saying you feel the same way. This doesn't change anything in our friendship. _ _You don’t have to reply to this right away or maybe not even at all if you want, but I just felt like you should know. I would've kept this to myself but I can’t in good conscience not tell you this knowing that I’m not going to see you for the next 8 months and maybe even longer._

_It's always been you._

_Yours in every sense of the word,_

_Gil_

* * *

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

 _Dear Anne,_

_I got back yesterday and I’m guessing the letter has reached you already._

_The letter itself may have been written out of impulse, even if not in a drunk frenzy, but please trust that none of its contents were. Everything I said in the tired early hours of the morning still stands in broad daylight. I've been thinking about it all for a while and I couldn't keep it to myself any longer. I didn't mean to alarm you but I just thought you should know as we may be parting ways sooner than expected._

_I understand you may not feel the same and you don't have to; I cherish our friendship above everything else and have come to realize this even more during our time apart._

_Hope you’re doing well._

_Your friend,_

_Gilbert Blythe_

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_Gilbert,_

[Draft saved] 

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_Gil,_

[Draft saved]

  
To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_Dear Gilbert,_

_I can’t do this right now_

[Draft saved]

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_Dear Gilbert,_

_I hate your face_

[Draft saved]

* * *

May 15 8:00 PM

from: Diana

_Anne?_

May 15 8:00 PM

from: Anne

_You know that letter from last week?_

May 15 8:00 PM

from: Anne

_Yeah, well it was from Gilbert_

May 15 8:00 PM

from: Anne

_Saying he liked me_

May 15 8:05 PM

from: Diana

_Oh my God_

May 15 8:05 PM

from: Diana

_What did you say?_

May 15 8:06 PM

from: Anne

_I didn’t say anything. I didn’t reply to his subsequent email_

May 15 8:05 PM

from: Anne

_The letter’s just under my desk. It's been there since last week. I don’t know what to do with it. I don't know what to make of it._

May 15 8:05 PM

from: Anne

_What if Ruby sees it?_

May 15 8:05 PM

from: Diana

_What does have to do with anything?_

May 15 8:07 PM

from: Diana

_Anne, Ruby hasn’t liked him since high school. You know that._

May 15 8:07 PM

from: Diana

_Still...are you okay?_

May 15 8:10 PM

from: Anne

_I do but what if she still has feelings for him that’ll come back when she finds out?_

May 15 8:10 PM

from: Anne

_Then what am I supposed to do?_

May 15 8:10 PM

from: Anne

_I’m fine, I’m just angry._

May 15 8:11 PM

from: Diana

_Why’re you angry? Did he write anything else in the letter?_

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

_He knows how I feel about this._

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

_That’s the whole THING about this._

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

_I don’t even want it to be a thing, but now it is. That’s the whole reason these things shouldn’t exist! Ha!_

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

_Because I’m OBLIGATED to say something back_

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

_And I don’t want our friendship to change_

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

_Things were fine the way they were and then he had to go ahead and say THAT and now everything’s changed whether we like it or not_

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

_And it comes with all these expectations_

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

 _As much as someone can argue things won't change, it's a known fact that they_ will _change_

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

_And even if I say no in the politest way I can, I don’t know if we can ever just move past it and be friends again._

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

_Because that’s how it works, isn’t it? One person says they like the other and then I say I don’t like him back in that way_

May 15 8:12 PM

from: Anne

_And then things can't go back to the way they were before_

May 15 8:16 PM

from: Anne

_Even if I want them to_

May 15 8:20 PM

from: Diana

_....Well, I think the question that remains then is do you like him back?_

* * *

May 16 10:00 AM

From: Diana

_I think you should talk to Anne_

* * *

May 18 8:04 PM

from: Ruby

_Hi Anne_

May 18 8:04 PM

from: Ruby

_Diana told me what happened_

May 18 8:04 PM

from: Ruby

_Do you like him?_

May 18 8:10 PM

from: Ruby

_Anne you've been typing for the past 5 minutes_

May 18 8:10 PM

from: Ruby

_If you like him that's fine, I'm so HAPPY for you!!_

_  
_ _  
_ May 18 8:10 PM

from: Ruby

_But you need to let him KNOW. Boys are rocks!!!!! even if it is Gilbert Blythe._

_  
_ _  
_ May 18:14 PM

from: Anne

_Especially Gilbert Blythe._

_  
_ _  
_ May 18:14 PM

from: Ruby

_Only when it comes to you :)_

* * *

**_12-08 boys minus gil_ **

May 20 1:10 PM

from: Charlie

 _it's actually pretty cute_ _  
_ _  
_

May 20 1:10 PM

from: Charlie

 _they're kind of like in that movie_ _  
_

May 20 1:10 PM

from: Jerry

 _what movie?_ _  
_

May 20 1:10 PM

from: Charlie

 _you know, the one with the letters_

May 20 1:10 PM

from: Charlie

 _come on man we watched it last week_ _  
_

May 20 1:14 PM

from: Cole

 _omg don't fucking pretend like you don't know the title charlie for fuck’s sake_ _  
_ _  
_

May 20 1:15 PM

from: Cole

 _you cRIED at the end_ _  
_ _  
_

May 20 1:20 PM

from: Jerry

 _you made diana watch it with you a second time_ _  
_ _  
_

May 20 1:23 PM

from: Cole

 _and you had miDTERMS the next day_ _  
_ _  
_

May 20 1:23 PM

from: Charlie

 _no wtf ur apartment just happens to be dusty_ _  
_

May 20 1:30 PM

from: Cole

 _say the movie's title charlie_ _  
_

May 20 1:23 PM

from: Cole

_I KNOW YOU KNOW IT_

May 20 1:23 PM

from: Charlie

 _ok fINE they're basically peter and lj from to all the boys i've loved before_ _  
_

May 20 1:25 PM

from: Cole

 _thank u._ _  
_

May 20 1:25 PM

from: Cole

 _they are_ _  
_

May 20 1:25 PM

from: Cole

 _except peter didn't write her a letter back_ _  
_

May 20 1:25 PM

from: Charlie

 _did you NOT read the books???_ _  
_

May 20 1:30 PM

from: Charlie

_what kind of an art major ARE you_

* * *

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

Dear Anne,

I can't pretend that I understand what's going through your head. Actually, I could pretend, but I don't know how close I'd actually be to the truth. 

But for whatever it's worth...would it really be so bad?

[Draft saved]

To: Gilbert Blythe (gblythe@gmail.com) 

From: Anne Shirley Cuthbert (annesc@gmail.com)

_Dear Gilbert,_

_If I'm being honest, sleep hasn't come easy for me in the past few days. Your letter, or letters, rather, haven't exactly put me at ease. As bad as it was for me, I don't think it was any better for you. I'm sure my complete silence hasn't exactly helped on that front. My silence hasn't been in anger (not entirely, at least) but in confusion._

_If the past months have revealed anything, it's that the world is wide and filled with enough uncertainty and hope for all of us. If there's anyone I'd like to explore it with, it's you, Gil._

_It's you._

_Yours,_

_Anne_

**Author's Note:**

> (i am still unsatisfied with this ngl but i literally couldn't think of anything else and i wanted to upload so i'm just going to close my eyes and press post and maybe come back to make edits)
> 
> as always comments are much appreciated!
> 
> also on twitter as ineghafa and tumblr as cheschi if u wanna follow me


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